I believe in love. I think it’s possible that in this busy, over scheduled and over connected world, two people can meet and fall in love. I don’t believe it happens fast but I believe it happens. This is my Achilles heel. The soft spot that my armor fails to protect and it gets me every time.
This time was not love but I thought the path was promising. I was caught up in his sweetness. He had a way to make you feel like you were his singular focus. He answered his phone and we would talk and share for hours. I learned about his life and he learned about mine. He was not only sweet but smart. That is a deadly combination for me. I love good conversation and talking about things from the environment to politics and he could cover every one. I let my guard down and I let him sneak right into my camp when my armor was tucked away. I did not even realize he was an enemy. I thought we enlisted together and were in the trenches trying to win the same war. I was wrong…again
I don’t really understand what happened but I knew on Saturday that things were different. I also knew he would cancel our NYE plans. I was right.
So this was my end to 2017. I am better for it. I added another plate to my armor and covered up that newly exposed wound. I won’t be so quick to believe the next sweet, smart man that says hi. It’s not that I don’t believe in love. I am just tired of getting it wrong.
On to 2018. Lesson learned. Stronger. Better. Smarter. Believer